My Heart, My Story

Bear with me this is quite a long post but I wanted to share my story with you! 

The Lord has always been abundant in my life. I don’t remember a time in my life that I wasn’t a Christian. At times I have had a hard time seeing Gods work or understanding why God does what He does but I have always relied in my faith. My faith has always been all I’ve had. For the past year and a half I was working for one of Minnesota’s largest volunteer fire departments. I was part of a program where six individuals lived full time at the fire station. I was living the dream that I had patiently prayed for and worked years preparing to do. I was so thankful that the Lord has listened to my prayers and had made me strong enough and healthy to do his work as a firefighter.

For those of you that don't know, I was chronically ill growing up. I was diagnosed with asthma and epilepsy when I was 18 months old. I was blessed by Gods healing hand and grew out of my epilepsy. I still struggled with asthma and found out that I had arthritis when I was 12. I spent a lot of time in and out of doctors, specialists and hospitals. I never would question God as to why I had to deal with so many health concerns. All I had was my faith in Christ. Senior year of high school 4 days before I graduated from high school I had a major asthma attack and some doctors didn’t believe that I would make it. I vaguely remember praying to the Lord to place his healing hand on me and to give me the strength to recover and live a healthy life. My parents prayed over me along with a strong church congregation. Three days later I was healthy enough to walk and graduate with my class. I owe my life to Christ and its His strength and healing power that I am alive today. I still live with asthma but I’m blessed and healthy to do his work that he has called me to do. I do not put any limitations on Christ and what he has for me, and my life.

As the year went on, while living at the fire department, I started going to church less and less relying on myself to handle my problems. Life started getting dark and I started becoming someone I didn’t know. I had hit rock bottom and thought that I was so far away from God that I started becoming very depressed. In the blink of an eye I lost the fire department. I was terminated and had to move out within two weeks. Once losing the fire department I really had a hard time thinking that I was worthy or good enough to do anything. I felt like I had nothing left to give. I cried constantly asking God if this wasn’t his plan for my life, then why would he have led me to the fire department in the first place? I prayed and prayed for the Lord to be present in my life again and for His holy spirit to guide me to where he wanted me to be. I knew that I wasn’t far from home with the Lord. I started praying and talking more to the Lord like I use to. I knew that I needed to start making changes in my life that would reflect someone that was a follower of Christ. I started realizing that I put so much of my worth into my job as a firefighter and forgot who I was in Christ.

February 24th 2013 the Lord was leading me to go to church that morning. Little did I know that Restoration Covenant was starting a new series called Life Hurts. The sermon that morning was reflection of what was taking place in my life. Pastor Rob was talking about how the Lord doesn’t passively sit by and watch his children poison their lives that he removes them from the situation and shows us His light if we openly allow Him to. I could feel the Holy Spirit pressing on my heart and moving in and through me. I asked the Lord to be present with me and I fully gave my life to Him again. A prayer partner prayed with me and over me and I could feel Gods presence with me, lifting off all the baggage that I had been carrying around with me. I truly could feel change happening in my life.

I am actively working on my relationship with the Lord. I want Him to be fully involved in all aspects of my life and not just some. He has given me new life and allowed me to be free from my demons and allowed me to drop off my baggage at the cross and to not look back. I want to life a life that is honoring to him and that’s why I believe he is calling me to YWAM. I know that I have things to work through in my life and I’m trusting in the Lord that he will lead me to his master plan for my future. I have been holding on to His truth that is stated in Romans 8:28, “We know that all things work together for the good of those who love God; those who are called according to His purpose.” 

Thank you for taking the time to read my story and listen to my heart. 

Blessings,

Mal

To Know God and to Make Him Known